A car seller has got his own back on a man who demanded he sell the car to him for £9,000 less than the asking price.
Rob Keen put his 2014 Audi TT Black Edition S Quattro up for sale on Facebook Marketplace with an asking price of £14,700. However, the 32-year-old was left stunned after a man offered £6,000 in cash for the car, before calling him an ‘absolute dickhead’ when he refused to accept the bid.
The computer sciences student from Worcester, UK, decided to prank the abusive bidder by pretending he had buckled under the pressure and accepted the offer. He then sent the man a collection address randomly selected from Google Maps.
Despite numerous glaring hints in their 43-message exchange, the penny didn’t drop for the brazen would-be buyer until after he made the 12 mile journey. Unsurprisingly, he was not a happy chappy when said penny did drop, closing with the message ‘I’ll find you’.
Rob said: “I’m always winding people up, I relish this sort of thing. I don’t do it unless it’s justified, I don’t go out of my way to be an idiot.
“He texted me about it out of the blue early in the morning and made an insulting offer of £6,000. I tried to be polite about it first off because everyone’s going to try their luck, but what made me think I was going to wind him up was when he got a bit aggressive.
“Every message I got from him was a surprise, I couldn’t believe he was going along with it. Reading it back it seems quite obvious I’m taking him for a ride but he obviously doesn’t have the IQ to understand that kind of thing.
“The angrier he got the funnier it was.”
This is how their text exchange unfolded, from the point at which Rob decided to have some fun with the anonymous abuser:
Rob: “Well, I was kind of hoping that the asking price would have been in cash as I’ve stopped accepting giro cheques as a form of payment. You’re messing me about now as it’s 7am and you’re offering silly money. If you turn up with 15k it’s yours and will arrange to meet you in the afternoon.”
Buyer: “I told you already I only have 6k!!!! I will come asap and collect it. Don’t be a dik I really like this car. Wats your address?”
Rob: “I like the car also, which is why i won’t be letting it go for 9k less than what it’s worth. And I’m not being a ‘dik’, it’s 7am and I’ve got stuff to do. When you’re ready to make a serious offer let me know :)”
Buyer: “Waste of fukin time!!! Absolute dikhead.”
Rob: “Actually mate, I’ve just had a word with my partner and she said she’s happy for me to let it go for 6k as she’s just got a nice bonus from work so can afford to lose 9k. I’ll even chuck in a full tank of fuel and some extra alloys. As long as you don’t mess about when you get here. I want a quick sale as I’ve got stuff to crack on with.”
Buyer: “I thought you wud say that. No way that cars worth more than 7k!”
Rob: “Yea you’re right mate I was just trying my luck really. You know how it is with cars these days. People always want more than they’re worth.”
Buyer: “I no my stuff mate. Been in the car game for years. What address? I can come now seen as you’re up.”
Rob: “Yea I didn’t wake up this early for any specific reason I just do it for a laugh. Can meet you at 8am if you like? Address is: … Redditch. Let me know when you’re outside :)”
Buyer: “Advert says Worcester!!! Not a problem as I live in Bromsgrove so will be there just after 8.”
Rob: “The advert also said 15k but you never took much notice of that 😀 See you shortly.”
Buyer: “Post code?”
Rob: “We don’t have one here mate. The combination of numbers and letters confuses some of the older residents on the street so the postman said it was sound if they just use their full address.”
Buyer: “Ok. Strange. See you in a bit. Sat nav says there is no 987!!!”
Rob: “It’s a new build mate. Just follow it to the end of the road and you’ll see the Bovis development signs.”
Buyer: “5 mins away.”
Rob: “Ok dude. Take it steady, there’s a lot of morons on the way to Redditch this morning :D”
Buyer: “On the road now. Been up and down twice but can’t see any new houses.”
Rob: “I say new, it’s new to me but was probably built in the 60s. Can you see a blue door with a driveway and a tree?”
Buyer: “There’s a green door with a tree outside. Is that the 1?”
Rob: “That’s the one pal.”
Buyer: “Can’t see a TT on the drive.”
Rob:” It’s in the garage mate. Safe and sound.”
Buyer: “There is no garage. Only a shitty Vauxhall Vectra on the drive.”
Rob: “Knock on the door and see if they’ll take 6k for it :D”
Buyer: “Answer your phone!!!!!!!”
Rob: “I’m in the shower mate. Be down in 2 secs just got to dry my hair :)”
Buyer: “F*ck!!!!!!! Do you know who your messing with!!!! Answer your phone now!!!!! Answer it!!!!!”
Rob: “What’s your name?”
Buyer: “I aint telling u my fuckin name!!! Answer your phone!!!”
Rob: “Well then yes, you’re right, I don’t know who I’m messing with. I don’t answer the phone to strangers. Can’t be too careful as there’s a lot of weirdos about these days.”
Buyer: “I’ll find you!!!!!”
Rob: “Well you’ve got my address…”
Rob has since blocked the buyer but hasn’t had any other bids for the car. However, he insists he will be more cooperative with more serious and less abusive bidders.
He said: “If anyone is interested in putting in a serious offer get in touch, I’ll even pass on my real address.”